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news round, fatin diet, 2006, food ingredients, cannondale fatty , jonathanrauch, slobs, nutritious cooking, unsaturated, fatty tumors in dogs , dietary fats, chemistry, monosaturated, hypertension, exercise, institute, ipod, big plump , articles, sexy fat girls , healingfats, diet and fitness, | Total amnesia: Save this one for an accident you’d rather forget. You may want to fat girls fucking consider downgrading this to Concussion, which allows you to say you don’t remember the events surrounding a certain time period. Which you choose should depend on how bone-chillingly stupid and predictable your crash was. During The Crash Sometimes, a crash is so instantaneous you have no time to react whatsoever. I once, for example, was riding along fat girls fucking on my own when I suddenly found myself sliding on my face. Other times, however, fat girls fucking you may be luckier: you see a crash coming, and have time to add some theatrics. In this case, I recommend the following steps: Unclip from your bike, if at all possible. Separate from it to whatever degree you can. Flail. Wave your arms while you’re in the air. Flailing looks good on camera, and increases your chances on winning in America’s Funniest Videos. |
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When you finally get out of the waiting room, though, slip the doctor a $20 and say there’s another $20 in it for her if she’ll play along and tell your friends it is one of the most harrowing examples of internal bleeding she has ever seen, and that they’re lucky they listened to you. Ruptured diaphragm, preventing breathing: If you get the wind knocked out of you, you can claim that you actually ruptured your diaphragm, and hypertension now have hypertension only hypertension moments to live before you suffocate to death. Explaining later why you’re alive may be difficult. I leave that to you. (Thanks for the idea, Tayfur!) Torn ligaments: Good general-purpose, believable injury, and practically impossible to disprove in the field. Highly recommended. High Altitude Pulmonary Edema: Use this if you’ve been riding clumsily the whole day. It’s best not to say you have this ailment if you’re below an altitude of 500 feet. High Altitude Cerebral Edema: Use this if you’ve been riding clumsily and saying stupid things. |
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