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| plump sluts , film reviews, diets weight loss, mercola, bbc news, fiction, bad cholesterol, malignant tumor, magazine, fat diet, hiv, nonalcoholic fatty liver , physical activity, monounsaturates, plump pics , jenny craig, fat calories, aldehyde, gastro, feminism, ban (law), | Explaining later why you’re alive may be difficult. I leave that to wikipedia you. (Thanks for the idea, Tayfur!) Torn ligaments: Good general-purpose, believable injury, and practically impossible to disprove in the field. Highly recommended. High Altitude Pulmonary Edema: Use this if you’ve been riding clumsily the whole day. It’s best not to say you have this ailment if you’re below an altitude of 500 feet. High Altitude Cerebral Edema: Use this if you’ve been riding clumsily and saying stupid things. Total amnesia: wikipedia Save this one for an accident you’d rather forget. wikipedia |
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| Here is a brief list, to help you get started. Internal bleeding: nonalcoholic fatty liver Keep this one in mind nonalcoholic fatty liver for the occasions when you’re hurt — no, seriously, you really are — but don’t have an nonalcoholic fatty liver injury that actually shows. Insist that you need to be taken to a hospital immediately. Once you’ve made this demand, however, you cannot back down. Follow through, even though you’ll probably feel just fine by the time you get to the hospital. When you finally get out of the waiting room, though, slip the doctor a $20 and say there’s another $20 in it for her if she’ll play along and tell your friends it is one of the most harrowing examples of internal bleeding she has ever seen, and that they’re lucky they listened to you. Ruptured diaphragm, preventing breathing: If you get the wind knocked out of you, you can claim that you actually ruptured your diaphragm, and now have only moments to live before you suffocate to death. |
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